Sunday, August 30, 2015

Complaining isn't rare being thankful is..

      It's been a long I've seen someone content in his/her life. Someone who says that whatever is there, is sufficient, is everything that person wished for.. We've been in a virtual race from the time we're born till the time we face our death. 

      Lets just contemplate what we've expressed gratitude for. Considering my story, I just moved out of home; away from my family, friends and loved ones.. Not that there is any loved one 😛😂. I now cook my own food, do my own chores but I understand now that I have not appreciated whatever I had until I lost it all recently. That maa k haath ka khana; value of that is understood when you eat the burnt food that you made, the screw ups in all the dishes that you cooked. The time when mom scolded to make your bed every single day for decades and when you do the same for a week you get shit tired. That feeling of your mother's hands on your head when you need it the most, when you wished to be with them the most.. And suddenly I realised I've never ever thanked her for all this.. I was a fool to think that all this is her duty and she's compelled to do this because of that. I was so naive to understand the mere fact that it's her love that made her do this relentlessly for years.. 

Dad and kid      You realise all the problems your dad must have faced to setup a home for you.. A room that you can call your own and still complain that my room is small; my room doesn't have this; my room doesn't have that. The loans that he took so that all your wishes, all your demands can be met. The time when you had to pay the fees for your new year in school, in college. That excitement, who can forget right? Similarly our parents will also not forget that time because this was the time they had to either shell out a huge sum for your future and not even feel sad. The humongous tension that our parents must have had to arrange that amount, to be in a position to pay that, we never knew about it.. Did we? It wasn't that we were small to understand it. It was just that they didn't want to overshadow your feeling of happiness. The same parents will think a thousand time before buying a 10k phone, but for you they'll easily shell out a huge sum just to see that smile on your face. I never thanked my dad for all of this, for all the pains he took for all the problems he faced. Today I say I'm educated but never forget to mention that I'm educated because of my parents. I never hugged him enough to tell how thankful I am, what a great dad he is. So here it is finally, Thanks pa.

      You remember that time when you were getting beat up in school or in your society compound, getting bullied at college and you had your brother or sister to stand by your side, to be your aide in all the stuff, to be your strength, to beat up the one who laid a finger on you. I do remember my brother standing up for me but I don't remember me thanking him enough for all he did. Whatever screw ups you do whatever demands you had, he was the partner in crime. But I forgot to think that before complaining about him to my mom when we grew up. I forgot that he's my big brother, the support my backbone at times you need the most. I never thanked him enough. Thanks bhai.

helping friend      We all have that friend that's hated by your mother, the one who's with you in all the shit stuff you do. The one who knows about exes and the one who knows about your crushes.. The one who will shell out his salary just to help you out in hard times, the one who will not study in exams just because you aren't studying. The one who will roam on the street with you when you were crying over your ex or were bitching  about someone at work. I've never thanked that friend but he's the one who should be thanked to give me the strength to move ahead, to stop looking back, to shred the fear of unknown. Yes complaining that he'll not be the there whole time when you need that friend is okay but what's most important is that the feeling of thankfulness shouldn't fade away in all the bullshit. Thanks a lot buddy for being there.  

      It takes nothing to complain about all the bullshit that you face but it's not so difficult to thank for the bullshit you didn't face because you had someone to take care of you. Be it your mom, dad, brother, sister, BFF, or even just a colleague. So just thank them after reading this. And if they permit 😉 give them a hug too and tell them how important they are and what they have done for you is commendable. 


Thursday, August 13, 2015

Life is not eternal... Knowledge is.. Preserve it..

      What an irony it is... It's been a billion years of evolution and still we have not understood what really matters in life! What actually makes us human! What gives us the real existence.. Today I'm not gonna give you a lecture or another article that miniscule man's existence but the reality to what really matters and what really comprises of life.. Is it really the money that makes the human unforgettable, the stature that gives respect, the Grand heritage that makes someone memorable.

      I'm gonna cite few examples and let's see what actually makes us human.. Steve Jobs was worth in billions when he passed away.. May God rest his soul in peace. But do we actually remember that? Do we actually know his net worth? Do we have him as the money man imprinted on our minds? No the one thing that comes to your mind, the foremost thing is the revolution that he brought to the computing industry, to the mobile industry, the legacy of systems, machines that changed the way humans live.. That's what you know him of, remember him of. And that's what the future generations are gonna know of him. When some years later, a chapter of him is included in the textbooks that students will learn, will actually have the title as "Steve Jobs - The pioneer" not Steve Jobs the billionaire..

      Coming to my next example, do you actually remember the most respectable person in a country? The president! How many presidents do you actually remember that we have had in past 50 years.

      Try recollecting and I'm sure if you actually remember just five, you'll understand what I mean. But if I ask you that who is Bhagat Singh? I may get a very apt and a prompt response from you all because he did something which is memorable. The very fact that someone so young can actually be so passionate about his own country that he'll actually smile and hang to death is commendable.. Isn't it. The very fact that an entire nation stood up for someone who wasn't a known name because of his stature, because of his parent's legacy. It was because of the courage, the astounding perseverance that this man had, that makes him what he is today and will remain for generations to come..

      When we actually think of what we are, we just think of what we've achieved? How much have I earned? How much bank balance we have? Which car do I have? How big is the flat I live in. We never think of what we'll be remembered by.. You know if it wasn't for the knowledge that newton had, we wouldn't have had the most important laws for long time.. It's the knowledge the know how that actually matters, which actually make us who we are, and what we become. If a mother doesn't pass on the knowledge to cook to behave to her children, who else will..
The basic need and the plinth of civilization lies in the pure fact that knowledge needs to be passed on, needs to be conveyed to the forthcoming generations so that the values can be imparted the civilization can flourish. We utilize almost 2% of our brains and we call ourselves the most intelligent of all species. Dolphins use more % of brains than us. The only fact is they have knowledge may be more than us but that can be passed on only to their species not to us.. Well it can be done but only when someone! Someone reading this article has the courage to actually go out of bounds and think of a way to communicate with Dolphins to understand what knowledge can they deliver to us. So yes, it's the knowledge that matters, that actually make us believe that we've evolved.

Post By:- Rahul Talreja

Monday, July 13, 2015

Unlock Yourself, Unlock Success

      What would your mindset be if you were to run a marathon? You know your limits, even if you have what it takes to come first would go in with a mindset of -
  1. Beating the other guys or 
  2. Wanting to finish first?
      Now it may seem that there is no difference between the two, but if you look closely you would find out that there is a lot of difference. The basic difference is that, when you go there to beat other people, that time you are limiting your preparation to some extent more than others i.e. if person A works out for 3 hours in a day, you might workout for 4 hours thinking you are working out more but instead you are restricting yourself, you are keeping a limit with respect to someone else, your point of reference is someone who is a different entity you cannot compare! Whereas if you work out for coming first regardless of what people are doing, you become limitless, you stop living in insecurity, in fear and what happens when you stop living in fear you break free have a renewed spirit of conquering your dreams.

Lewis Hamilton
Lewis Hamilton
      In a given situation, if Lewis Hamilton races to be faster than Nico Rosburg, he might win a couple of times but if he loses he would dwindle under his own wrath of first of all losing and secondly not winning. On the other hand if he races to come first he would just have a target of achieving it, not worrying to that extent from Nico, because his sole objective is coming first, and even if he loses the only regret that would haunt him is he lost and whatever happens to Nico wont distract him that much. Such is my point, we have heard from childhood that “Every Child is Special | Not everyone’s all fingers are same | Everyone has a different script written for themselves by God”, then why not implement it in real life? Why has life today become a race where the reference point is not yourself but someone else? I understand everyone is mature enough to know this, many won’t agree with my thinking or my point of view and I truly respect that, again because everyone sees the world differently, people may have similar opinion but it is impossible for two people to have exactly same opinion.

      As a student why is it necessary for us to compare ourselves with our peers? Why is that we take into consideration other people’s lifestyle and try to integrate it into our own? Steve Jobs was only one classy man, he had a vision, he was one of a kind. He didn’t care about lot of things that weren’t related to him or he just focused on what he wanted to achieve and didn’t see any limits to achieve it! 
Do your bestHis main objective was his vision, how he wanted to achieve his idea, he didn’t allow anything stand in his way, he went lengths and distance to achieve it! Again the point is what you want, not what others are doing and you have to follow, this is for those people who get depressed if they don’t score well. It is healthy being sad about your score if it’s less than your-self in-comparison to the past, but being sad because you scored less and your mates scored more is just allowing someone to stay rent free in your apartment (brain)! Person A, got 9.65 pointer and Person B, got 7.96 pointer. If B only cares to beat A then what is the use? B should aim for full 10 pointer instead of getting more than A, only then would B progress in reality. Everyone understands this but honestly ask yourself how many of you reading this article actually follow it? Keeping a tab on how much your competitors have studied is good, making it the sole reference is wrong. Hiding from people study material, if not helping others, then why do you take pride in advising someone “You know help someone with your knowledge it would help you revise!”, when you don’t intend to follow it. It has just become a myth! 
      Your life is not very easy, the reality is harsh, the life is tough it would give you pain in your ass! One other reality is our mindset, people who boast about being great without any real deal are faux, but people who boast about being great after they have achieved it are Achievers, Goal winners, Rule Setters, Out of the Box, misfits from others because there is a difference between them and reality! You have heard wise people keep their mouth shut, now look it from different point of view- even the people who don’t know stuff are also silent, so how should one differentiate a wise man from a fool? If you don’t speak up, always act dumb how is that the other person would realize your true potentials.

Rocket Kid
When the matters are of your career, it is better to boast and speak up if you have a substantial baseline, when Arjuna told Lord Shiva he didn’t know anything, he was talking to the almighty Lord/God. When you present yourself to someone you are not talking to GOD, you are talking to his creation, you can’t expect the one in front to be the Lord himself, who would already know your life history! It is necessary to understand that what you speak about yourself, what you think about yourself also gives you confidence, brings you unknown, unexpected opportunities and isn’t that good for your career and life? When before the exam a student comments “Oh shit! I have not studied anything I might fail” it can so happen that what he/she has said may come true, then what would you do? Instead if you speak the truth, maybe there are chances you may fail (if you haven’t prepared at all) but if you have prepared and know that perfectly you would have a self-reassurance, confidence and others hopes with you! When you speak up the truth, you help your peers also, they also get confidence speaking up then it may not necessarily mean your girlfriend/best-friend/boyfriend and it is not necessary to compare the preparations of two individuals since everyone is different. In a way you are helping them unknowingly, improving your karma and good deeds! To gain confidence first of all being truthful helps and secondly you have to reiterate to yourself stating- “Who’s the best? You are the best!” in front of a mirror but be careful there is a small thin line in between of being arrogant and confident!

      My ideologies are different than maybe all of you reading this draft, I would appreciate you guys sharing your views on the topic hopefully I was clear enough in what I as a student come across and feel sometimes! Comment down below with your point of view and I may not make a great difference in your life, but if I am able to make even 0.000001% of change in how you view things my this article would be successful.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Expectations: The Less, The Better

      Expectations are a form of happiness that we would like to see in the future. They are ideas and thoughts that have not yet happened. When expectations are not met it leads to great disappointment. Our expectations stem from our beliefs and our beliefs flow from our needs. How? Let's take an example:

      Let's say If I'm lonely and call up a friend, I have an expectation that he will relieve my loneliness. If at the last minute he cancels, I will be disappointed. Notice that it's not his problem and he's probably fine with the situation. If I understand that I have made a request to my friend and if I allow him to make his own choice, I can be okay with whatever happens. I will have to find another way to solve my problem. It would be worse if I'm explicit with my expectation of him because that creates a demand on him. It causes pressure on the friendship and if he still bails, then the disappointment is greater knowing I made a request that was rebuffed. Sometimes disappointment can really hurt when it touches the ego and we take it personally.

      For our own sanity and happiness, managing our expectations is a better choice than continually being disappointed or giving up. Here are eight steps that will help you begin to short circuit your process of creating unrealistic expectations:
  1. Become aware of expectations you are creating.
  2. Understand the beliefs behind your expectations.
  3. What are your needs in the situation? Are there other ways to meet them?
  4. Is your expectation a reasonable or a likely outcome?
  5. When your expectation turns out to be incorrect, notice and adjust accordingly.
  6. When you are disappointed, don't take it personally.
  7. Stay flexible: What other options do you have?
Our disappointment should be turned on its head: Instead of being disappointed with an outcome, we really should be disappointed in our own unrealistic expectations. We can ask for things but we don't always get them. When you adjust your expectations to fit reality, you are much less likely to experience disappointment. In time, it will become a rarer occurrence. You don't have to give up hope. We can still anticipate a good outcome, just be ready to be okay with "what if" and accept it. As the old saying goes: 
"Don't count your chickens before they've hatched."
Now, let's focus on some more aspects to expectations and it's solution:

Less Expectations, More Learning

      When you expect less from yourself you tend to be focus more on yourself and you allow great things to come to you. This requires trust. If you trust yourself, that everything you needed will come to you by simply focusing on your work rather than expecting something. Then it will surely happen. That's the only solution. If you expect less from yourself then you will be able to learn more. How? Simply, because when you expect less you tend to focus on the learning part rather than the result part of it.

      And Maybe the most peaceful and quickest way to achieve something is a way you haven't thought of yet. Be willing to go with the flow.

Change Your Thoughts

      If you are feeling disappointed, it's because of the thought you have about the situation. So if you don't want to feel disappointed, change your thoughts.

      The first thing I do when I feel any disturbance to my peace of mind is say to myself, "I am determined to see this person/situation differently." And if the situation is very big then at that moment I feel disturbed which is normal but after a day or two I say that statement to myself. This is how you step into your power. Everything happens for you, not to you.

      You'll be amazed at the shifts in perception that occur when you become willing to release fear and see love instead.

      When you focus on releasing the thoughts about how you imagined your life to be, your most loving, truthful self can come forward and guide you. There is nothing to figure out.

Be Realistic

      It's human to feel disappointed now and then. It's also human to expect things. But we must focus on reducing our expectations to minimal. So, that even if it doesn't happen we will not be disappointed about it.

Let's take another example:
      If you are a parent and your child is very hardworking and your child did everything that he can do to bring up good results in the exam. Here, the expectation of you as a parent will be that your child will top the school or college. But, predicting the future is not in our hands. So, here 2 situations can occur:

  1. Either their child will really top his/her school or college. Which is the ideal situation which the parents want. But this situation is less likely to happen usually.
  2. He/she will fail to top the school or college but he/she scored a decent marks. This situation which is more likely to happen will make the parents so disappointed that they will scold and treat their children very badly.

Sumail Hassan Syed
Sumail Hassan Syed. PHOTO: Source
      The second situation will make their child feel more bad about themselves because they did whatever they can do and had given their 100% and still if they can't top the college then it's not their fault. Not everyone is meant to do things which others do. Some are good at painting, coding, photography, playing instruments and one shocking thing for parents is that some people are very good at playing computer games. You might be thinking, so what? How playing games can be good or will help their child? The Answer is that recently, a 15-year old Sumail Hassan Syed from Karachi made history on February 9th, when he helped his team called "Evil Geniuses", claim the Defence of the Ancient 2(DOTA 2) Asian championship in China. For the people who don't know, Dota 2 is a multiplayer online battle arena video game. And just by playing a computer game well enough his team won $1.2 million prize money. Can you Imagine? Such a big amount. So, to all the parents out there, I would just say that your child has ability to do well in at least 1 thing which only he/she can do exceptionally well as compared to others.

So, to end up with the article I would like to say that,

Expect nothing, Appreciate Everything