Sunday, July 27, 2014

How to deal with failure

     Many of us think of failure as the end of their life but that is not true. Failing is not something that shows us we are incapable of doing something, it shows that we have tried something. Trying is important because when you don't try, you have already failed.

      If someone says to you that your luck or your destiny is bad and you cannot do anything with it and you have to live with that failure for the rest of your life, then ask them, "Why can't  I change my destiny and why can't I change my luck?", and the answer will come that it is not in your hand, while the fact is that it is in your hand. The way you do things and the amount of hard work you put in something defines you and not your luck or destiny. You alone have the power to change your destiny and no one else.

      Many of you must have heard about an old saying, "Kise pe Zulm karna paap hain par zulm sehna usse bhi bada paap hain(It is evil to do injustice but it is more evil to endure the injustice)". But think of a situation, when someone wanted to do something and he/she has only 1 chance, at that moment many of you, almost 90% of the people, try to demotivate them by saying that you can't do it. That is the moment when the person fails in his/her task. If you think of this situation carefully you may realize that this is actually worse because someone is trying to do something and you're demotivating them by saying that you can't do it.

      There are times when you will fail but life doesn't end there. There are people who will tell you to quit if you can't do it. But there are only 10% who will give you genuine reasons to quit. Those are the people I like most. They are your helping hand towards what you want to do. But that doesn't mean if they tell you to quit you obey them blindly, you should listen to them carefully, ponder on the problem and ask yourself, "How can I overcome this?". If you have the answer then you can go ahead with your task.

      Recently I heard a story of 2 boys who were the very best of friends. One was of 7 years while the other was of 10 years. Once they went somewhere and the older boy fell into the well and he didn't know how to swim. He was yelling for help, so his best friend looked around for help, but no one was there. The 7 year old went to look for a solution and he saw a rope and bucket. He quickly picked it up and threw it in the well and told his best friend to hold on. The boy despite his small stature was able to lift the 10 year old boy because he was determined to succeed. Soon, after saving him, both were thinking that if they tell their friends and family about this no one would believe them. As it turned out they were right and no one believed them except an old man. The old man explained to the family that they were able to accomplish this impossible task because there was no one to demotivate or doubt whether the little boy could do it. The boy had to succeed or else his best friend would die. The thought of losing his friend motivated the little boy and helped him succeed.

      Even if you failed at something or think you will fail at something, it shouldn't stop you from trying. Failure is a sign saying that you tried to accomplish something in your life and you stood for it. Your focus should be on the task rather than the reward you will get on finishing said task. There are people who work because they love it and people who do a job they hate just because the pay is good.

      Imagine this is the last day of your life and you can either be depressed thinking that you're going to die the next day OR you can live your last day to the fullest. If you choose the second option then you will be the one who is UNSTOPPABLE, no one can demotivate you because you will always listen to your heart not to what others say. Be it 1 person or 1 lac people doubting you, your reaction to them will be, "Yes, I will do it and no one can stop me". You should follow your heart and do what it says rather than listen to people who are afraid to try something new out of fear.

There's a difference between a loser and a winner and that I will show you with the help of a quote,

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Money can't buy Happiness

      A lot of people think that money can buy happiness, while some believe otherwise. In a way, both arguments are correct, but the first one is valid only when we use money for the well being of others and not entirely for ourselves. Like if we are donating some money or buying some food for poor people with all our heart then it will give you true happiness. It is only possible when we truly want to help others and not when we want to showoff.

      A spate of retail therapy is said to be good for boosting your mood, but it turns out spending money doesn't always buy happiness, especially if you're materialistic. It also brings us to a point that when you depend on things to be happy then you're soon going to be bored with it and will no longer will be happy to have it or buy some more things. Let me relate this with a real life example, How many of you love spending time either with your friends/family? Almost everyone. Why? because they are fun to be around and you understand each other well and help each other out whenever possible. But, if I ask some of you to spend some hours with your best friend and spend some hours with your gadgets which you like, then the result will be that you will have more fun and will be more happy when you spend time with your best friend rather than spending time playing around with gadgets. From this we can conclude that things or gadgets cannot give us happiness in long term but they can give us temporary happiness. 

      Have you ever got suddenly happy when you saw an infant smiling and you start playing with that infant even if you don't know the child? The Answer to this will be, Yes, for most people. Infants can bring such joy to us, have you ever wondered why? It is because human beings are meant to share their happiness with people around them and that is simply because happiness never decreases when shared, it only increases.

      You all might have thought and hoped that a lottery win will make you happy forever. Think again, because evidence suggests a big payout won't make that much of a difference. Many of us do think that it will make us happy forever, but it doesn't. Winning the lottery isn't a ticket to true happiness, however enticing it might be to imagine never working again and being able to afford anything you want. One study famously found that people who have big wins on the lottery ended up no happier than those who have bought tickets but didn't win. It seems that as long as you can afford to avoid the basic miseries of life, having loads of spare cash doesn't make you much happier than having very little.

      Happiness isn't a quality like height,weight,etc which could be measured, in fact a lot of people try to measure happiness so that they can make most out of it, but happiness can't be measured by anyone in this world. It even seems like the very act of trying to measuring it can distract us from what might make us most happy. An important study by Christopher Hsee of the Chicago School of Business and colleagues showed how this could happen.

      Hsee's study was based around a simple choice: participants were offered the option of working at a 6-minute task for a gallon of vanilla ice cream reward, or a 7-minute task for a gallon of pistachio ice cream. Under normal conditions, less than 30% of people chose the 7-minute task, mainly because they liked pistachio ice cream more than vanilla. For happiness scholars, this isn't hard to interpret - those who preferred pistachio ice cream had enough motivation to choose the longer task. But the experiment had a vital extra comparison. Another group of participants were offered the same choice, but with an intervening points system: the choice was between working for 6 minutes to earn 60 points, or 7 minutes to earn 100 points. With 50-99 points, participants were told they could receive a gallon of vanilla ice cream. For 100 points they could receive a gallon of pistachio ice cream. Although the actions and the effects are the same, introducing the points system dramatically affected the choices people made. Now, the majority chose the longer task and earn the 100 points, which they could spend on the pistachio reward -- even though the same proportion (about 70%) still said they preferred vanilla.

      Based on this, and other experiments, Hsee concluded that participants are maximizing their points at the expense of maximizing their happiness. The points are just a medium, something that allows us to get the thing that will create enjoyment. But because the points are so easy to measure and compare -- 100 is obviously much more than 60 -- this overshadows our knowledge of what kind of ice cream we enjoy most. So next time you are buying a lottery ticket because of the amount it is paying out, or comparing jobs by looking at the salaries, you might do well to remember to think hard about how much the bet, or job will really promote your happiness, rather than simply relying on the numbers to do the comparison. Money doesn't buy you happiness, and part of the reason for that might be that money itself distracts us from what we really enjoy.

     If you do something which can make others happy then, you will have the same feeling as I have at the moment and I will say it with the help of a quote,

Do you agree with me? You can comment below and share your views regarding it.

Saturday, July 5, 2014

Disability is the new ability

      Often people with disability are regarded as people who cannot do anything in their life, but if someone encourages them to do something then they are the people who could make the most out of their lives.

      You might have heard about Stephen Hawking. A British theoretical physicist, whose world-renowned scientific career spans over 40 years. His books and public appearances have made him an academic celebrity and he is an Honorary Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts, a lifetime member of Pontifical Academy of Sciences, and in 2009 was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest civilian award in the United States. Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by motor neuron disease. Hawking gradually lost the use of his arms, legs and voice, and as of 2009 was almost completely paralyzed. As you can see, with those many disabilities anyone would think of dying as the best option. But people like him are the ones who show the rest of the world that disabilities are not meant to stop someone's life, they are meant to make you stronger and more stronger.

      If we think of learning disability there are many great people who had learning disabilities but have achieved a lot more in their life. You might know a few or almost all of these people who had learning disabilities, they are as follows: 

  1. Walt Disney who was an American business magnate, animator, cartoonist, producer, director, screenwriter, philanthropist and a voice actor and yes, he was co-founder of "The Walt Disney Company".                                                                                                                 
  2. Albert Einstein, you all know about his achievements in the field of science and technology.                                                                                                                                                    
  3. Alexander Graham Bell who was an eminent engineer, inventor and innovator who is credited with inventing the first practical telephone.                                                                                                                 
  4. Thomas Edison a great inventor who had over 1000 patents and his inventions are in various fields used in our daily life could not read till he was twelve. His most popular invention is the electric light bulb. He also developed the telegraph system.                                                                                                                 
  5. George Washington could barely write and had very poor grammar skills and the list goes on.

      As you could all see the achievements made by these great people have an immense effect on the world even after having disabilities in their life. We should all learn something from them. If we don't get something in life or lack the skills to do something or even if someone is better than us then we blame the other person, our luck, our destiny and our knowledge. But this should not stop us from achieving what matters to us. A quote by John Burroughs which is rightly said, says,
A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he begins to blame someone else. -John Burroughs
Life is all about doing what you like and spreading happiness in the world. Disability is disability for those who look at it as a disability while some other look at it as a challenge. The meaning of disability varies from person to person. A man named "Jahid" who doesn't have one leg, came in Roadies(a youth-based popular reality television show in India) and got selected, and when you see his audition video and episodes from Roadies then you will be shocked. He has done all those things which would be difficult for even a normal person to do. For his audition video, you can click here.On the day of audition, the judges asked him, "How would you perform tasks when you don't have one leg and you are disable?" to this he replied that "I don't have one leg but I'm not handicap. A handicap is a person who cannot do anything and I can do things and can perform task". It is all about how we look at each other and how we look at things. If we have right attitude towards every other person then we can help each other out and make this world a better place to live in.

      So, here comes a quote which I would like to say,